Glaring AFI Omissions

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Posted by James from cpe-024-211-065-155.sc.rr.com (24.211.65.155) on Wednesday, June 04, 2003 at 12:48pm :

We all have them, I'm sure. So who are the characters that had you swearing at the AFI's shortsightedness?


HEROES

All I'm going to say: Where the hell was Max Rockatansky?


VILLAINS

10. The old people from Cocoon.

Where they good or bad? I'm not sure.


09. Max Zorin (A View to A Kill)

He had the same idea as Auric Goldfinger, but he also had a blimp. Yet which one made the stupid list?

*Special Runner-Up*

09. Weapons of Mass Destruction (from any Bond film)

I pity the inspectors that have to search that volcano, giant space station, or island of San Monique.


08. Dr. Zaius (Planet of the Apes)

He wants to keep you down and burn both books and dolls alike.


07. Whomever it was that shot Hooch. (Turner and Hooch)

How did 'Man from Bambi' make it and not this f*cker?


06. Big Brother (1984)

The film, not the show, but take your pick. What kind of sicko gets offended by a dirty, naked chick bearing coffee?


05. The guy that wanted to outlaw dancing. (Footloose)

Even more censorship, man. And this time, right where it hurts.


04. Greedo (Star Wars: Just 'Star Wars')

I think we all know how he weasled himself out of this list. But Lucas can't help this sneaky little Rodian anymore. (We know you shot first!)


03. 'Keys' and G-Men (E.T.)

Who didn't learn to mistrust the government at an early age after watching these guys try to butcher E.T.?


02. Khan Noonian Singh (Star Trek II)

AFI, from Hell's heart, he stabs at thee- and yet you don't include him on your little list. He not only made Star Trek seem cool, but those ear eels were a nasty bit of business.


01. The dolphin mastermind from Johnny Mnemonic.

Matrix who? I implore you.



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