Raiders of the Spinx's Heart

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Posted by Salah from dialup-63.208.71.89.Chicago1.Level3.net on April 12, 2001 at 21:40:37:

“Fools,” Indiana Jones bluntly stated as he quickly stepped down the capital’s stairs. “Bureaucratic Fools!”
“What happened?!” Marion Ravenwood asked.
“They don’t know what they’ve got there,” Indy replied.
“Well I know what I’ve got here,” Marion smiled. “C’mon, I buy you a drink. “You know, a drink?”
Weeks Later, Dr. Henry Jones, Jr., sat bored and nursing his wounds in his office. He was a professor of archeology, at Princeton University. And he now was grading term papers.
“Hmmm... A. A. A. What?! Well...C+,” His friend Marcus Brody walked in. Indy looked up. “Hi, Marcus. Did’ja see my new car?”
“Yes,” Marcus said in his precise English accent. “I see your enjoying the “settlement’. We’re both rich men you know.”
“Yea, but that’s basically all I took. I gave the rest of my money to the Museum.”
“As did I. But Indiana, the Museum has another job for you.”
“Really?!” A wide grin spread across his face. “Will it get me out of grading term papers?”
“Yes, it will. You’ll have to fly to Cairo, though.”
“Jeez, Marcus! Are you insane?! The Nazi’s are going nuts over there. I mean if I was to just waltz right in there, blow up another plane, incinerate another couple o’ hundred nazis, I mean come on! The ‘Feurur’ want my head on a platter. I mean I did help to kill Detrich and Toht. And I stole his ‘prize’.”
“I know Indiana, but this is important. The nazis have another, ahem, “spiritual” goal. While digging for the ark, the Nazis discovered a hieroglyphic tablet telling about the sphinx. It states that inside the sphinx is a jewel the size of your head with unspeakable powers. On the tablet there is a depiction of rays coming from the jewel and turning an ordinary man into what appears to be, well for the lack of a better word, a god!”
“Okay, but I’m going to need some financing.”
“Don’t worry, Indiana, you’ve got it. And you have a ticket out on the next Pan-Am flight.”
Indiana’s flight was halfway across the Atlantic, when a man sitting behind him moved into the seat next to him.
“Dr. Jones?” Indy didn’t wake up, and so the man nudged him. With a .45. “Doctor JONES!”
“What?” Indy woke up, and was starring right into the barrel of a gun. He quickly looked at the man’s face, and then to his lapel, where a swastika emblem was pinned. The man was a Gestapo. “Oh jeez.”
“Ve knowch zat you arch after zee Sphinx’s heart. Az arch ve. But you zhall never reach Cairo alive.” Just then some turbulence struck the plane. Indy took his chance. POW. The Gestapo’s nose was now broken, and Hitler’s stormtrooper was out cold.
“Ohh!” Some one on the plane.
“Don’t worry he was a nazi.”
“Oh.”
Indy picked up the .45 and sat the Gestapo agent next to him. A few minutes later the Gestapo came to.
“Good news travels fast, huh? Talk or you dead,” Indy said as he shoved the .45 into the Nazi’s side.
“Too late.” The German smiled and clenched his teeth together. Indy heard a small kisshht and a green mist came out of the Nazi’s mouth “Too lateee-”
“Poison! Dang it!”

Indy stepped of the plane and was greeted by his friend Salah.
“Hey Salah! Over here!” Indy shouted. “Short time, no see!”
“Ha Ha Ha,” Salah had a funny kind of laugh. “C’mon Indy I take your bags.”
Soon they were driving through the streets of Cairo, and Indy was wearing his normal garb, bullwhip at his side.
“So Salah what’s going on around the Sphinx? Big dig going on?”
“I’m afraid not Indy, the Nazis have no archeologist this time. Tomorrow they plan to get the Jewel Heart. They are going to blow up the Sphinx.”
“What?! You’re joking! With Dynamite?!”
“Yes, I’m afraid so, it will be a great loss.”
“That’s not gonna happen. I’ll make sure of that.”
“How?”
“I don’t know-“
“I’m making it up as I go,” Salah finished. “Great.”




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