Don't laugh, it's monkey kung fu!

Posted by Jackie Chan from spider-mtc-th013.proxy.aol.com on January 31, 2001 at 01:25:32:

In Reply to: Read it and weep... posted by Slick on January 30, 2001 at 18:01:55:

That Indiana Jones guy, he calls himself an archaeologist. But what kind of archaeologist DOESN'T use drunken boxing left and right? Eh? Eh?

: Feast your eyes: I'm twenty-three, single (too much of a chick magnet to get married) and date eight times a week. I drive a jacked-up pick-up truck with real loud exhaust pipes and am assistant produce manager at a Piggly Wiggly in the deep south. But that's just to pay rent on the apartment I have in my mom's basement (got my own door to the backyard); my true passion lies in dot.commery and I hope to ride that bourgeoning wave to the big time. I'm 5'7" without lifts and 230 pounds of solid man. I workout with free weights five days a week and spend the other two mastering mad monkey kung-fu. I have one blue eye and the other is sort of hazy. I have my hair cut retro like David Cassidy when he was in "The Partridge Family" years (no chick ever told him "no" either). I do volunteer work at a funeral home and brag that I've never been to a dentist. I have a collection of over 350 T-shirts and eat "Taco Bell" three meals a day.

: Favorites: Turn Offs:

: "Playboy" and "Penthouse Letters" chicks with hairy legs
: Janet Reno Hillary Clinton (too mannish)
: Indiana Jones movies chick flicks
: Jenny McCarthy male frontal nudity
: Regis Kathy Lee
: porn church stuff
: Baked bean burritos Tofu
: Peters Bros. fedoras toupees
: Wested leather jackets bowling shirts
: tight, kinky perms comb-overs
: pit bulls cats
: shooting rats at the dump charity events
: flea markets debutante balls
: Howard Stern Rosie O'Donnell
: G. Gordon Liddy Eleanor Roosevelt
: Harleys Toyota Camrys
: Bud (not Light) wine spritzers
: Oreos Vienna Fingers
: "Frasier" "Ally McBeal"

:
: Hell, you all know what kind of dude I am; a man's man. And I spend thirteen hours a day on the Internet. Thanks for sharing my world.

: : So, what does everyone out there do besides this "Indy stuff"? Family, career, other hobbies, school? Just wanted to talk something other than the number of millimeters deep the bi-swing pleat ought to be on the RotLA jacket.

: : Tell everyone else about yourself.

: : Cheers!

: : Patterson

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: That Indiana Jones guy, he calls himself an archaeologist.  But what kind of archaeologist DOESN'T use drunken boxing left and right?  Eh?  Eh?

: : Feast your eyes: I'm twenty-three, single (too much of a chick magnet to get married) and date eight times a week.  I drive a jacked-up pick-up truck with real loud exhaust pipes and am assistant produce manager at a Piggly Wiggly in the deep south.  But that's just to pay rent on the apartment I have in my mom's basement (got my own door to the backyard); my true passion lies in dot.commery and I hope to ride that bourgeoning wave to the big time.  I'm 5'7" without lifts and 230 pounds of solid man.  I workout with free weights five days a week and spend the other two mastering mad monkey kung-fu.  I have one blue eye and the other is sort of hazy.  I have my hair cut retro like David Cassidy when he was in "The Partridge Family" years (no chick ever told him "no" either).  I do volunteer work at a funeral home and brag that I've never been to a dentist.  I have a collection of over 350 T-shirts and eat "Taco Bell" three meals a day.

: : Favorites:                               Turn Offs:

: : "Playboy" and "Penthouse Letters"        chicks with hairy legs
: : Janet Reno                               Hillary Clinton (too mannish)
: : Indiana Jones movies                     chick flicks
: : Jenny McCarthy                           male frontal nudity
: : Regis                                    Kathy Lee
: : porn                                     church stuff
: : Baked bean burritos                      Tofu
: : Peters Bros. fedoras                     toupees
: : Wested leather jackets                   bowling shirts
: : tight, kinky perms                       comb-overs
: : pit bulls                                cats
: : shooting rats at the dump                charity events
: : flea markets                             debutante balls
: : Howard Stern                             Rosie O'Donnell
: : G. Gordon Liddy                          Eleanor Roosevelt
: : Harleys                                  Toyota Camrys
: : Bud (not Light)                          wine spritzers
: : Oreos                                    Vienna Fingers
: : "Frasier"                                "Ally McBeal"

: : 
: : Hell, you all know what kind of dude I am; a man's man.  And I spend thirteen hours a day on the Internet.  Thanks for sharing my world.

: 
: : : So, what does everyone out there do besides this "Indy stuff"?  Family, career, other hobbies, school?  Just wanted to talk something other than the number of millimeters deep the bi-swing pleat ought to be on the RotLA jacket.

: : : Tell everyone else about yourself.

: : : Cheers!

: : : Patterson

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